A place for help, advice, and ideas

Monday, July 19, 2010

Reader Question

I received an email this weekend that touched on a bit of an etiquette question,

T from NJ asked "I'm in my soon to be sister in law's wedding this fall (we are marrying brothers a few months apart). I wish I could say I'm elated to be in the wedding, but we haven't bonded and have very little in common. The kicker to this whole situation is not only am I in the wedding, but I am the wedding party. I'm not sure how to plan all of her events on top of planning my own wedding. Would I be totally out of line to ask her mother and my mother in law for help?"

Wedding parties and siblings, or soon to be siblings, is always a touchy subject. I hope that perhaps the wedding planning process can be a boding experience for the two of you. At the same time I can imagine how planning a shower and possibly a bachelorette party would be insanely stressful while planning your own wedding. I would definitely consult her mom and your mother in law about the events. There are many brides that forgo showers all together. If a shower is a definite think about doing a couples shower that you and your fiance would both host. If not you could always host a small shower during the day and the bachelor/bachelorette parties that evening. As far as asking the mom's for help, I would say yes. Even if they can't or don't want to contribute financially they can help with some of the planning and prep work. Best of luck!

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