We have all obviously delved into the world of social networking as is evident by the fact that we are active bloggers. What would life be if it wasn't for our daily Facebook check-ins? With that has come a whole new wedding predicament...How much is too much? This thought came to me this weekend when one of my best girlfriends got engaged (Congratulations to Laura and Joey, one of the most beautiful couples I have ever seen!). As we were all capturing the moments of her and her new fiance glowing, (She is usually the photo snapper) I promised I would send the pictures her way. She laughed and said , Not on Facebook! This brought me back to the "relationship status" change dilemma that came my way when first engaged. Becoming engaged and getting married is such an intimate thing, that its hard to feel comfortable sharing it with "friends" who you really don't know all that well outside of cyberspace. But with the age of technology, people are likely to congratulate and discuss the new hot topic before you even get a chance to log on yourself. It took me 3 months to change my relationship status. Some were confused as to why I wouldn't want to yell on top of the mountain (or newsfeed) and share this wonderful news, but to me I felt exposed and wanted to share the moment with those around me first. Believe me, I was beyond ecstatic, but that didn't mean I was ready to share the moment with people I hadn't spoken to in years. That being said, once the congratulations start coming, family members or friends who haven't been alerted might get upset that they are finding out this information via the internet versus you personally. That means that today more then ever, it is you and your fiance's responsibility to share the news personally whether it be email, text, or phone call, to all who you think should know before it gets to them in this way.
And after you get passed the "relationship change," it goes on to status updates. Is it ok to make a countdown via status changes? or how about venting about vendors, friends or in laws? When the emotions start running high through the process, there sometimes feels like their is no other outlet. While it is likely to happen at times, I would say use this sparingly. You never know who will get wind of your updates that may not even be on facebook. The last thing you want is an awkward call from your in-laws asking what your latest ranting status update is about after cousin Billy(He's my friend on this thing?!?!) gives them a call. And while you are counting down the seconds to your big day on the regular, daily updates counting them down are likely to make your "friends" hide you on their newsfeed. While we have entered an age where sharing your happiness with the world in such a way is the norm, be sure to indulge in your happiness with yourself, your fiance, and your friends, in the actual moments. This is easier in hindsight, but something to keep in mind along the way.
Lastly, the photos. About 5 minutes into your wedding day it is likely that someone will "mobile upload" your photo onto facebook allowing everyone an IN on your big day. Be sure to communicate to the people around you what your feelings are about this. Some brides are happy to share and be posted on the internet before they even make it down the aisle, but others feel exposed and angry. It is likely if you express your feelings on this to those closest to you, that they will be happy to listen. At the end of the day, they are just as excited for you and want to share the excitement. Just be sure that it is on your agenda. Photos will begin to make their way onto facebook rather quickly and so before your wedding day even approaches, I encourage brides to make a decision on their photo privacy settings. Facebook allows you the option to block certain people from seeing tagged or uploaded photos and this might be something you want to do for certain someones. Once it comes time for you to decide if you want to share your own professional photos, you can also make the decision to block certain "friends" from seeing. It is inevitable that there are people out there jealous or not able to be happy for you and you want to surround yourself with only positive energy around such an intimate day. I was hesitant about sharing my own photos despite how much I absolutely loved them, but in the end, decided to share a few of my favorites in order to allow my family and friends the oppurtunity to see them while (hopefully) not wedding overloading my other devoted cyber buddies.
What are your fears or hesitancies about Facebook and social networking sharing when it comes to weddings? What decisions did you make and why ? We would love to hear (and help!)
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